Teaching kids about science. It’s what I love to do.
I so wanted to write this post last night, but I couldn’t get my thoughts together. I knew I needed to sleep on it and wake up to a new day before writing it down like this.
I got fired yesterday. Well, you could really call it “laid off” but I hate that phrase so effing much because it gives me absolutely zero closure. I would rather have been fired. I wish they would have told me point blank what kind of problem they have with me instead of just saying, “your position has been eliminated.” Give me a break.
I tried to keep my job, which I love so much despite the drama and the politics. I asked why. I begged for another reason. I reminded them of the hard work I have done and asked “does any of that matter?” Their response: “That was your job. It was expected of you.” I see where your loyalty lies.
My dear husband, friends and family are supporting me. They are there for me, for which I am so so grateful. But it was my mother-in-law who said just the right thing: “Could this be a blessing in disguise?” I couldn’t believe she said that at first. I was shocked. I wanted someone to say “They suck! How could they do that to you?!?!” But eventually, after the texts and the phone calls and the facebook messages, I realized that “It’s probably a blessing in disguise” became my go-to phrase. Those words are my salvation right now, because they are 100% true. And here’s why…
1. Stress. The place was killing me on the inside, turning me into a pessimistic bitch and a very unpleasant person to work with. That is NOT me. I am supposed to be friendly, warm and always in search of the proverbial bright side. Taking those characteristics away from me and turning my heart inside out only caused unnecessary stress, which I do not need in my life. Not now. Not ever.
2. My Job is Not My Life. Goodness. This is something I had to start reminding myself of every single day. While it is true (and witnessed by others to be so) that my attitude towards my job is expressed in my everyday life, it is also true that I take work too personally, and I take it home with me where it just doesn’t belong. I let it completely take over my life, which is why this whole getting fired thing is taking such a toll on me now.
But even after all of this, I still have a special place in my heart for the company and the wonderful people that work there. I wrote them an email last night. It explains why I can still appreciate that place, even now.
I just want you all to know what a pleasure it was to work with you.
We all have our reasons for loving and hating the [that place], and no matter how hard it may have seemed sometimes, [that place] and all of you will always hold a special place in my heart.
Its where I realized what I’m meant to do with my life. Its where I rediscovered my love for science education. Its where I learned how to use an excel spreadsheet (cause let’s face it, that’s some difficult stuff right there). Its where I met all of you.
So I just wanted to send an email to let you know that each and everyone of you is appreciated, no matter what anyone else says. You work hard day in and day out so that children and adults all over the Gulf Coast region can learn and hopefully go on to make a difference in this world. Don’t forget that what you are doing does make a difference. You matter.
Now if you’ll excuse me, there’s a 12-pack waiting on me and I intend to destroy it. (Totally kidding….or am I?)
P.S. Ya’ll treat those camps like their your babies. Cause they were mine – the camps, the kids…everything about it.
P.P.S. Please don’t forget about the Parkway Branch Library’s “What’s Up Wednesday” outreach program. Those kids are awesome and they are expecting to enjoy our Aussie programming on December 14. Don’t let them down.