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Random conversations w/ The Hubs

I only have one conversation.  We conversed via email about one hot minute ago and I thought I simply must share it with you.  Here goes:

The Nerd: YOU GAVE ME A F*CKING HICKEY!!!

The Hubs: Haha…sorry.  I just don’t know my own strength.  Turtlenecks are SOO in right now anyway.

Can I just express how high school-ish I feel right now?  A hickey?  What woman in her upper twenties gets a hickey from her 30-year-old husband?!?!?!  I texted this to my sister and her only comment was, “Weirdo.”  Sis, I must agree with you.

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Outfit post: Working Girl

Blouse: Ann Taylor LOFT (borrowed from neighbor) // Skirt: Ann Taylor LOFT (borrowed from neighbor) // Heels: Sam & Libby (borrowed from neighbor) // Hair pin: F21 ($1.50)

*Disclaimer:  My New Year’s Resolution was not broken for this!

I love my neighbors!  Kris is super friendly and always cares how we are doing.  Thomas, their little one, is the most adorable thing ever.  Tybee, the puppy, is always welcome to jump on me and lick my face, even when they tell her not to.  And Lisa is a dream come true.  They are the best neighbors I’ve ever had and may go down in history as being the best we ever do have.  We cook dinner for each other, we drink each other’s wine, which brings me to this point:  always make friends with your neighbors, cause if you have too much to drink, you can just walk home.  Fact.

Another thing that makes Lisa even more fantastic is the fact that she loaned me this fabulous outfit for a very special job interview.  (And it is certified “fabulous” by a gay man, so there you go.)  As you all know, I’ve been working at an oiled wildlife rehab center since July, but I’ve been actively job hunting since then because I knew this would be temporary.  Today I interviewed for a super fun education job at our local science museum and I GOT IT!  Woo hoo!!!  Well, that is pending a background check, which I’m crossing my fingers about…

Totally kidding, people.  I’m just hoping they don’t give me a drug test…you know…cause of all the poppyseed muffins I eat.

P.S. I don’t really do drugs, unless you count benedryl.

P.P.S. I don’t eat poppyseed muffins either.  Thought you should know.

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The weekend I almost died.

A couple of weekends ago, I went to the big city of Gautier, Mississippi to visit with one of my closest friends, Noelle.  We had such a great time!  That night we went out to dinner, enjoyed a few beers, and then decided to take some pictures on some train tracks.  Maybe not the smartest idea, but definitely a fun one!  After that, we were in quite the picture taking mood, so she drove me to a spot on the water and this is what we found:

It was the most beautiful sunset.  Ever.  We couldn’t stop taking pictures.  Later that night, we went swimming, has a mini Glee marathon, and slept in the same bed like a true sleepover.  We giggled.  We ate too much.  We had a blast.

The next day, we decided to make an impromptu trip to New Orleans for a fun lunch and some vintage shopping.  As soon as we got off the interstate, I saw this Banksy street art and had to stop.  I mean, I didn’t care that it was the ghetto.  This was important.  The Hubs was proud.  Then I found a blue power ranger looking guy on the side of a building too.  Don’t think that was Banksy…

We shopped at two places: Funky Monkey and Buffalo Exchange.  I found a few really great things.  At Funky Monkey, I grabbed a pair of pre-owned, totally soft and broken in black skinnies.  They fit perfectly.  And for only $10, well worth the drive.  I would have been happy with just that purchase.  At the BE, I found a floral blouse, a gray tee, and a “casual jacket” for The Hubs.  I almost got him a plaid Dolce & Gabbana (spelling?) shirt, which was $32.  I kinda wish I had now.  I don’t particularly care for name brands, but something about seeing The Hubs in a D&G shirt would crack me up.  Seriously.

But we had a little complication right before our shopping spree.  See, we parked and started walking.  Then we saw a restaurant we wanted to eat at, so we started to cross the street.  It was clear, but apparently the guy driving up, who was still a few cars down, wasn’t happy with us interfering with his day.  So he revved up and almost hit us.  It was close.  Only a moment later, he hit an SUV, then tried to turn on a side street to get away, almost hit a man on a bike, then hit an oncoming car, then ran up onto the patio where we were about to eat.  Um…CRAZY!  The guy got out and started screaming obscenities.  I couldn’t help but feel that if he saw us, he might chase us down or something.  So I dragged Noelle to the next restaurant over, Nacho Mama’s, and we hid out in the back, drinking margaritas and shaking from our near death experience.  Good times!  Here’s a picture of the aftermath:

What did you do last weekend?

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Busy girl.

I’m the kind of girl that has a running list of when my favorite book sequels are being released.  I love to read.  Its quite an addiction, really.  But this book…I’ve been waiting for this book for a year.  Its the 3rd and final installment in The Hunger Games trilogy.  Start from the beginning if you have no idea what I’m talking about.  And then you can thank me later for the awesomeness that I bestowed upon you.  By the way, you’re welcome.

Getting this book was a different story entirely.  Last year, when the 2nd book, Catching Fire was released, I was at the bookstore at 9am on the dot to get it.  I then proceeded to read nearly half of it in the bookstore because I just couldn’t put it down.  This time, however, I actually had a job to go to and couldn’t make it.  It wasn’t until 2 days later that I finally asked The Hubs to pick it up for me on his way home.  With a long sigh, he obliged.  Unfortunately, it was sold out at the book store he went to.  SOLD OUT!  That’s how awesome it is, people!  So he went to another store, after which he immediately informed me that they had JUST sold out.  Wow.  I was heartbroken.

Until I got home.

There, on the kitchen counter, in all of its amazing glory, was Mockingjay.  That’s when I realized that The Hubs loves me (because saying “I do” is never enough, right?).

But I’m on a schedule to get this read by next Tuesday, because another long-awaited sequel (prequel, actually, but whatevs), The Clockwork Angel, is hitting the stores that day.  And wouldn’t you know it?  I’m off that day!  And the angels sing, “Haaaaaalelujah!”

As soon as I’m finished with my job interview (details to come!), lunch with Black Gaga (aka Maura), groceries, and dinner with The Mobile Morrisons, I may find a little time to read a few paragraphs before I pass out from exhaustion…the good kind that comes from a really amazing day.  I’m sending out some seriously good vibes for Tuesday.  It certainly helps that I’ll look like a million bucks in my interview outfit, courtesy of the best neighbor in the whole world (Thanks, Lisa!!!).

And I’ll be headed to Montgomery on Wednesday because my sister and her hubs have decided to bring another little one into the world.  And they want me to photograph the event.  This should be interesting…

Seriously though, I’m already in love with my soon-to-be-born neice, Mary Alexis.  Can’t wait to meet her!

I told you I’ve been a busy girl!  Now, what’s going on in your life?  Let’s celebrate the awesomeness together, shall we?

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Ask and you shall receive.

A few weeks ago, I bought myself my very first laptop.  Its not any laptop, its actually a netbook, meaning it is teeny tiny.  I can actually fit it in my purse!  So the night I bought it, I looked for a case, but wasn’t happy with any of my options.  That’s when I decided I needed to challenge my friend, Deanna, over at Recycled Lovelies to make one for me!

My specifications:

  • Padded
  • Made from scrap fabric (recycled!!!)
  • Pocket for charger
  • Shoulder strap

Not only did she meet my expectations but she EXCEEDED them!  The yellow vintage fabric from the 60s is so my style, you would think Deanna was my bestest friend.  I meeeaaaaan, seriously.  Um, D, can you make me a cute little dress from that fabric?  And a skirt from the striped fabric?  Because that would be absolutely dreamy.

But I digress.  The point is, I LOVE IT!  I love that its unique.  I love that its recycled.  I love that its handmade by a friend.  Every time I look at it, I will remember Deanna and her hard work.  So, thank you D!

I also asked her to make me a very simple drawstring pouch (also from recycled fabric) to put my fancy camera in to protect it, since I usually just throw it in my purse, where it is constantly battling with the elements (random pieces of gum, dust, dirt, etc).  So here it is (and I also love it!):

Its like Christmas in the Davis household this weekend!!!  And now I’m going to get ready for a short road trip, so I can have a sleepover at my friend, Noelle’s, house.  This is long overdue and I can’t wait!  The picture below is the only pic we have together, but I plan on fixing that situation.  Pronto.  Happy weekend, everyone!

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How to become a pirate in 5 easy steps.

The Hubs is most likely going to become a pirate in a few hours.  How is he going to go through this transformation, you ask?  Well, its more complicated than it seems.  There is a series of steps one must follow in order to take a ride on the Black Pearl.  Aaaaaaand here they are:

1. Have a “good eye” and a “bad eye.”  This is essential.  One doesn’t become a pirate with 20/20 vision.

2. Schedule surgery for the “bad eye”:, just because that’s what a normal person would do.  But remember, you are not normal if you aspire to be a pirate.  DUH!

3.  Exactly one week (ONE week) before your surgery, make sure your “good eye” goes rogue…cause you’re a PIT (Pirate In Training) and that’s how you roll.

4. Leave your “bad eye” alone, just the way any normal timber-shiverin’ scalywag would do, and schedule a new surgery for your “good eye.”

*Confused yet?

5. Make sure this surgery is high risk and DO NOT LEAVE the doctor’s premises without a brand spankin’ new eye patch as a souvenir.  You can just tell people you stole it from a little kid.  They will completely understand…because you are a pirate.

And THAT, my friends, is how you become a pirate, which The Hubs is trying to do today.  Please be thinking of him during his PRE (Pirate Record Examination).  I’m sure he will appreciate your thoughts.

P.S. All pirate jokes aside, I am actually quite scared.  As positive a person as I am, I have an incredibly morbid mind and all I can think about is the worse case scenario here…so I resort to pirate jokes…for my sanity.  Please keep us in your thoughts today.

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To Clarify…

Thanks for all of the kind words, in the form of comments, facebook messages, emails, and texts.  I appreciate every one of you (even if you are a blog-lurker who chooses not to comment on here, but send me a super secret fb message instead…I still like you).

But I feel the need to clarify something.  Clear the blog air, if you will.

Apparently, my little rant made it sound like I don’t know what I want to do with my life, career-wise.  That is simply not true.  The problem is that I want to do too many things.  So many things that my mind is always switching gears, leading me from one idea to the next.  I blame it on the ADD…and the ungodly amount of nicotine lozenges I still consume multiple times a day.  (Don’t judge me!  At least I’m not smoking.)

This constant mind changing is slowly driving The Hubs insane.  I don’t blame him when he asks, “Can you just do one thing for two years?!?!  That’s all I’m asking.  Two.  Years.”

But that’s difficult for me because, like I said, I want to do so many things and fit it all into my life RIGHT FREAKIN’ NOW!

So I’ve decided to hold off on the photography career, for just a moment, and truly exhaust all of my options for a biology career.  I’m looking into everything from environmental policy internships in D.C. to research jobs in Hawaii and the Florida Keys to husbandry jobs at aquariums.  I’m determined to try my hardest to find a job that will make my college education worthwhile.  If that becomes impossible, then I will move onto photography and art and something else creative.

Did I also mention I’m writing a book?  See?  I just can’t make my brain stop.

Also, will somebody please help me find some used tan-colored flat sandals (particularly the ones in the picture below, care of Kendi Everyday).  I’m thisclose to breaking my New Year’s Resolution for a new pair of sandals, since mine are all gross and broke down. But maybe it is a blessing in disguise that the ones I’m coveting aren’t even available anymore.  HELP!

UPDATE:  I take that back.  These sandals ARE available, they were just hiding out as a different color on the website.  And they are ON SALE for $10. I wear 7.5 and I adore the cognac color.  Gifts, in the form of sandals, always accepted.

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For now, I’m a photographer.

If you caught my raging post last night about my career woes, then this might surprise you.  Not 5 minutes after writing that post, I took a step back, turned on Harry Potter  and the Half-Blood Prince, and realized what I need to do for now.  I have decided to really push myself into photography to see what happens.  I think I have a pretty good eye for photos and don’t ever want to wonder “what if.”  So its on, people.  It is so on.  (By the way, I should totally drop the F-bomb in my posts more often, cause I got more readers from that post than I’ve gotten in a while.  You guys make me sick.)

I can totally make this work between saving the wildlife and writing a book.  I got this.

So if you would like to book a photo session, please email me at anerdlikeme@gmail.com for pricing and info.  We got this!  For now, enjoy some of my favorite photos, taken by The Nerd herself (that’s me, in case you haven’t figured out that I sometimes write in 3rd person).

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What they don’t tell you.

You grow up.  You have big dreams.  You rack up thousands upon thousands of dollars in student loans, unless you are that lucky piss ant that gets his or her college education paid for, to whom I say, “Screw. You.”  And then, finally, you try your hardest to get a damn job.  But no.  Not gonna happen.  Because, apparently, you have to have EXPERIENCE to get a job.  As if your fucking college education wasn’t good enough.  Kinda like that time you tried to get a student credit card (because after all, ALL the students are getting them because they are poor, helpless STUDENTS), but they wouldn’t give you a lick of credit without, you guessed it, credit.

So how, you may ask, do you get by without a job?  All you have is a degree that cost a fortune and took a huge chunk out of your life just so that you could regurgitate the scientific method, one of Shakespeare’s sonnets, and Freud’s thoughts on screwing his mother.  Give me a fucking break.

I’m in this exact situation.  And it sucks ass.  I will admit that I did actually get a job immediately upon graduating, but that only meant that I spent the next year of my life in absolute hell, crying in my classroom closet and begging (BEGGING!) rich teenagers to shut the fuck up. (I did not use the word fuck.  That would have gotten me fired.)  I will also admit that I took a year-long hiatus from anything degree-related to pursue a dead-end cake decorating career, which only left me feeling helpless and without any room for growth in my life.  Sure, it was fun, but it wasn’t taking me anywhere.

So now that I’ve actually figured out the system, figured out where to really look for jobs in my field, I am yet again left by the wayside.  According to all 6 jobs I spent hours applying for today (which oddly came back very quickly), this is how they felt about me:  “Reviewed – Failed Basic Qualifications – No further consideration of application will be made.”  I failed the BASIC qualifications!  Do you know what this means?  It means I suck.  It means I am a failure.  It means I am about to be on the couch, left to my own devices, and watching Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince for the 23rd time…because that is what I do when I get depressed and feel like there is no way out…I travel to a fantasy world and pretend I can perform magic with my mad jedi mind skills.  Although, some would say that I live in a fantasy world all the time, I would have to disagree.  You just think I live in a fantasy world, because I make it look easy to forget about life’s troubles.  What’s really happening inside my head is constant thinking, constant nonstop contemplation of the world and what it has to offer me, what I have to offer it.  And then, after one long stride and a huge freakin’ leap, I fall flat on my face, veg out on the couch in my misery, and start all over again the next day.  This is my life cycle.  This is how I deal with shit.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must be going.  I have a movie to watch.  And a tissue to dry my tears.

P.S. My apologies for this incredibly profane and emo post, but I had to write this.  I had to express what I couldn’t say out loud.  If you are still here, still reading: Thank you.  From the bottom of my poor little achy breaky heart.

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Vegan Almond Eggplant Parmesan

I’m kinda sorta eating low carb.

And I kinda sorta fell in love with almonds recently.

And The Hubs kinda definitely loves my eggplant parm.

So I decided to tweak it a bit and not only make it extremely low carb, but vegan friendly as well.  I know, what am I thinking?

This eggplant dish is tasty, crunchy, and completely guilt free on all fronts.  Give it a shot.  Fall in love.  But don’t send it love letters and roses, because its not sending any back.  It only has yumminess to offer.

Vegan Almond Eggplant Parmesan

1 medium sized eggplant, peeled and sliced longways into thin strips (think lasagna noodles)

1 cup roasted salted almonds, ground in a food processor

egg substitute (the equivalent of 2 eggs) plus 1/4 cup water, mixed together

1 jar of your favorite organic marinara sauce

1 cup grated mozzarella-style almond cheese (found at your local health food store, hopefully)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Dip eggplant slices into egg mixture, then into almonds, and place onto a cookie sheet.  Make sure you get both sides of the eggplant covered.  Bake eggplant slices for about 20 minutes.  No need to flip.

Once eggplant slices are baked, get out your favorite casserole dish and start layering the eggplant, mozzarella, and sauce as if you were making lasagna.  start with a little bit of sauce on the bottom of the dish, then add eggplant, cheese, and sauce.  Repeat until you have used up your ingredients.  You should get 2 or 3 layers, depending on the size of your dish and eggplant.  Add a little more cheese and some parsley, if you like, to the top layer.  Bake for 25-30 minutes, or until casserole is bubbly.

There you go!  Serve it with a light side salad and you have just made your husband’s day (or your fave vegan friend).  You’re so very welcome!

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